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Poster: SomeDarkHollow Date: Mar 5, 2008 5:38pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: sbds

This guy named Osama bin something says he's got some what he calls, I don't know, what was it again?... maybe "weapons grade plutonium"? Something like that. And he's looking for some help putting together a "special package". Anyone know what he's talking about?

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Poster: ghostofghostofrbnw Date: Mar 5, 2008 5:48pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: sbds

Down came the good fairy and she said

"Little Bunny Foo Foo
I don’t want to see you
Scooping up the field mice
And bopping them on the head"

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Poster: patourkid Date: Mar 5, 2008 6:03pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: sbds

you have to sick a butterknife in the toaster while holding your tongue JUST right......

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Poster: ghostofghostofrbnw Date: Mar 5, 2008 6:49pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: sbds

Boldly springing into action he phoned his wife who ran a modeling school, whereupon he... yes, he ran around the back of the broadway at hollywood boulevard and vine to see if he could find him
Some big, large, unused cardboard boxes ( no shit! )... after which he hit up the ralph's on sunset for some aunt jemima syrup, some kaiser boiler foil and pair of blunt sissors, yeah! ... yes,
N the parking lot of ralph's ... where no prices are lower prices than ralph's... in the parking lot of ralph's, in between a pair of customized trucks where nobody was looking, he cut out some
Y, really, really nice wings and he covered them thoroughly with foil ...

Then he took those wings and wedged one under each of his powerful arms and sneaked into a telephone booth ..yes,yes!! and then he shut the f**king door! ... and he pulled down his blue denim policeman-type trouser pants, and he spread even amounts of aunt jemima maple syrup all over the inside of his legs! ... soon the booth was filling with flies ( help me! help me! help me! ) ... he held
The legs of his boxer shorts so they could all get in, and when each and every one of those little cocksucking flies had gone into his pants and they were lapping up all that maple syrup, he bent ovEr and he put his head between his legs and he said in a very clear, impressive, ron-hubbard-type voice: new york... and the booth and everything lifted up, out of parking lot, and into
tHe sky.


This post was modified by ghostofghostofrbnw on 2008-03-06 02:49:22

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Poster: daliguana Date: Mar 5, 2008 4:07pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: sbds

You pick up this working girl hooked on smack/ hustle and score that's all I do she says/ she says ten bucks for head fifteen for half-and-half she says three hits a day/ thirty-five per/ you say that's seven tricks a day at least/ she says sometimes I get lucky she says once this guy gives me a bill and a half just to eat me/ only time I ever came/ you figure you can save her/
you sell your color TV it keeps her off the streets a whole day/ You hock your typewriter for one jolt and you shotgun, your watch/ a week later you say listen, I'm a little short she says no scratch, no snatch/ You say look it is better to give but she says Beat Off Creep/ one night they spot you in the street in your skivvies trying to sell your shoes you tell them who you are and they nail you/ then she happens by and she says Christ you look fucked she says Hang Tough/ but you don't say anything you just think what a Bum Rap a nice, sensitive guy like me ...


[...]

This post was modified by Diana Hamilton on 2008-03-06 00:07:39

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Poster: daliguana Date: Mar 6, 2008 10:48am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: sbds

A Professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to his first year medical students .

Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject, the Professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.

He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said,"Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?

"She replied, "Probably deer hunting with his buddies."

The professor laughed so hard he could not continue with the class